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Friday, 22. October 2004
Can't Escape Emotion
Kate
18:21h
Friday, Oct. 22 A group of five women stood in a semicircle facing the man playing the piano. We'd done some vocal technique warmups and sung a couple familiar tunes and a "new" song -- Put on a Happy Face -- and I'd joked that it would be wonderful torture to use on Everett when he has a pout on. Then we launched into another "new" one, called The Prayer. I had been at Joan's the other day when she had Oprah on TV, and had listened to Celine Dion sing it and been totally unmoved. But last night, my imagination played a trick on me. The song became my prayer for Mom and myself: that she be safe and I be strong and able to let go, that wisdom and faith be there for both of us. As we sang the words through for the first time, tears sprang to my eyes. I told myself to smarten up, and attempted to think about something else. It didn't work. As we discussed high notes (for we are a group of altos with some concern about our lack of high-end range), my lips squeezed together. I could feel my face clouding up, beginning to crumble. It was no use. With a mumbled "I'll be right back," I made my exit as quickly as I could and walked outside, where I shed the tears and, with great difficulty, composed myself to reenter the room. Everyone kindly did not stare at me, or ask me if I was all right, but carried on as usual for the few more minutes until the class ended and we all left. I cried all the way home, and spent the rest of the evening somewhat shaken. The Prayer I pray you'll be my eyes I pray she finds your light Lead her to a place
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