Sunday 3 April 2005
9:09 a.m.

It is a peaceful Sunday morning, with both my children home from Edmonton, engaged in their usual day-off distractions as if they’ve never been away. First thing this morning, Everett lined up his playstation games in a long row, then scratched his head over them as he decided which one to play.

My wakeup call was from Dad at 8 o’clock. He is going golfing and was to tell me whether I needed to go over there and stay with Mom, or she could come here. It sounds like she is well enough today to come here, which is a surprise. I went yesterday at 1 o’clock and she stayed awake till I left for the airport at four; she stayed up the whole time, and was up again later when Joan and her family visited; this is more than she’s been awake at one time since Monday.

She was still very confused though, not making a lot of sense when she spoke, and sometimes looking past you as she talked. Dad has been cutting the methadone back gradually and if we are lucky, that is all it is. There is always the possibility that the cancer has spread to her brain, the thought of which turns my blood to cardboard. As cute as Mom is when she can’t straighten her thoughts around, it’s not comfortable to witness either.

I’d walked in carrying a planter bursting with bright yellow violas, and Dad said “There you go, you said one of your angels would bring flowers, and here she is!” and Mom replied with a chuckle that he and I must be playing tricks on her.

After he left to go shoe-shopping I helped her into clean pyjamas, washed her face with a warm cloth (she enjoyed that), rubbed lotion into her dry feet, and worked them over with a view to some healing stimulation. She watched some of the men’s curling championships but made comments that weren’t quite connected to the game; later she laid in her bed while I sat at the sewing machine, and she rhapsodized about the possibilities of starting a quilting club back home if there isn’t one already. I’m sure there is, but if not, she was figuring out how it could all be done. This excited her quite a bit, as did the thought that I could join one if there is, and learn more about quilting even if she isn’t around to teach me.

They should be here soon. I will have to get the kitchen cleaned up and, with Jordan and Mom and the boys for company, it will be a day of hanging around the house contentedly. I’ll cook a chicken for supper.

Not to be alone in the house last night was a vast improvement. Everett and I watched The Triplets of Belleville and I attempted to make boxes with paper, following instructions I’d printed off the internet. Will probably stick to the simplest, most straightforward pattern; now just have to go out and buy some bristol board so the box will be heavy enough for my intentions.

Here they are at the door.

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