Dec. 31

It’s time to make my New Year’s wish, and yes, I am asking for Don’s healing.

I don’t mean trivial improvements in his gait or his mental acuity, either. Those would be appreciated, but what I am asking for is bigger than that.

What I am asking for is more than I dream possible for Don, because I have come to such a point of acceptance of him the way he is. That’s Don, and I don’t question it; rarely do I imagine what he or his life might have been like if he’d not been born with cerebral palsy.

But once in a while, I do imagine it. I see another 14-year-old who moves with ease and grace, and I envy that for Don. I see a young man making a life for himself, and I hope Don is able to do that.

I am not being too specific about this healing, because when I started writing about it, it was all “I don’t want him to lose his balance and fall anymore” and “I don’t want” this and “I don’t want” that. And that is focusing on the negatives.

I need a positive vision, but I don’t have one. Oh, a little -- but it seems that if I leave it open-ended, unclear, the universe will fill it in a way better and more beautiful than I could imagine.

I won’t state my wish in a negative sentence, full of “don’t wants.” Yet there is a power in specifics that I cannot forget, so before the end of the day I will carefully formulate my wish into words that are somehow limitless, so that the unmanifested has all the freedom it needs.

What have I got to lose? Only my faith that my NY’s wishes come true.

Of course, wishing on behalf of someone else is outside the realm of what I have a right to impose upon others -- my way not always being the best way, I mean, no matter how much I may believe it is.

Still, it’s my wishing time and it’s up to me to wish for my heart’s desire. And so, I wish for Don to be healed of cerebral palsy. I ask the Sky to make my wish a reality in 2003.

Happy New Year to us all.

xoxo
Kate